Employee Benefits Expanded to Include Aircraft
Human Resources announces its most expensive new benefit: access to the airplanes you were hired to fly.
Read the memo →NOW RECRUITING · SHAREHOLDER VALUE FIRST
An airline with its priorities perfectly wrong.
We operate serious flights under a profoundly unserious corporate philosophy. Our shareholders are imaginary. Our expectations of decency are not.
*Employment is virtual. Compensation is fictional. Satisfaction is at management's discretion.
A MEMO FROM THE EXECUTIVE OFFICE
The joke is corporate greed. The flying is real.
Profit Airlines (KPI) is a satirical virtual airline. Fly properly simulated routes, log honest flights, and enjoy the absurdity of a company that can put a price on almost anything.
We are serious about inclusion, accessibility and how we treat each other. We are not serious about our fictional employee compensation policy.
See the actual policies and pilot handbook →STAFF NOTICE — PLEASE READ
Benefits currently available
- Access to aircraft, subject to availability
- The opportunity to fly them
- Exposure to middle management
- Official memos about absolutely nothing
FISCAL YEAR 2026 / INTRANET ARCHIVE
HR Bulletins
Notices from an organization with little understanding of human resources.
Catering Department Discovers Sandwiches Have a Cost
The board has referred the matter to an investigative subcommittee on unapproved bread expenditures.
Read the memo →Management Announces Partnership After Negotiating With Itself
A strategic agreement has been signed between departments that share a remarkable number of executives.
Read the memo →LEGAL DEPARTMENT / REALITY DIVISION
Read the handbook before believing the slogans.
Actual membership requirements, flights, activity minimums, behavior policies, and official communications are explained in the nine-page SOP.